I never write, and I want to write. So I'm going to, and we'll see if anyone listens (or reads... whatever).
Has anyone been to an event, or a party, or some type of gathering in which YOUR child is the bad example. She hits, she spits, she pulls her clothes off, and all the other children follow her? It's one of those moments where you hear your own, younger voice echo in your head saying "My child will never do that." and then it bites you. HARD. The other parents, while condemning their own children's actions (which are exactly what your child showed them that they can do) tries to be polite and tell you "It's okay" as you apologize profusely. Finally, after your last futile attempt to get them to sit still and chill out (hey, look at the other kids sitting quietly on their mothers laps, let's try that!) you try to save yourself anymore embarrassment and pick up and leave.
Children are such interesting little people. They each are so different and individual. Which I suppose it the way that it should be. My daughter is just barely 12 months old, but can truly hold her own. She knows her opinion and is anxious to share it. I remember when she was just a few weeks old another mother in the" mothers' room" at church, while trying to control her 12 month old, was telling me to enjoy her being so little and young, because "You just wait till she has an opinion!" I Just laughed and bit my tongue from snidely saying, "Oh, she came that way." And boy did she ever. She is quite the ring leader and can get 2 year olds to act naughty when they know better. Sometimes my husband and I debate over whether or not she really knows what she's doing. There are times that I'm sure we've hit a break through and think "Yes!!!! She finally knows what sit means! But let me tell you, just because she knows the meaning of "sit" leaves no guarantee that she'll actually perform.
But, as difficult as it is to make her "sit and be still", in today's times, I'm so grateful she doesn't. I can see the leader in her. Such strong opinions can serve her well. She is a girl on a mission, and is not about to be stopped, hindered, or told no. She will not be deterred and never holds back her opinion, even when it's not socially acceptable (and I can tell you, she knows when it's not!). So what if we were all so strong? What if we weren't shy and apologetic about what we know is right? What if each day we woke with ambition and a purpose to accomplish? The world would be a different place.
So start today folks! Find a purpose and a mission and don't be shy. Take a lesson from our little ones and do what you were sent here to do and never hold back! I'll do my best too!
4 comments:
You wrote that all so well! I feel exactly the same way. You think I would come to grips with it all, but I am STILL constantly in awe of the individuality of each of my children. They are each SOOO different! And don't be too hard on yourself--there have been MANY times that I have been somewhere and one of my kids (mostly Owen) has misbehaved and all the kids follow his behavior. It's so hard because you teach them differently at home, but people would never guess that looking at them misbehaving. You just have to remember it's not a reflection of you as a parent--it's their individual dispostion and them expressing their individuality. Unfortunately we can't control them :) So I think if we can just figure out how to direct these strong willed kids into doing good things and to WANTING to do the right thing--it will serve them well for their whole life.
Anyways, that was a little long! You need to post some pictures of this 12 month old Megan! I can't believe she is one--is she walking?
I love that! I love how Max is strong and doesn't let people push him around. My BIGGEST pet peeve is when other people get mad at him when he is just trying to stand up for himself. He doesn't like kids to boss him around, and I love it!
I know how you feel. Aspyn has this personality that she needs to be the center of attention at all times. It's really embarssing when I have to take her out of relief society because more people are paying attention and laughing at her then they are listening to the lesson! Maybe we need to get our girls together.
Isn't it amazing how young they are and yet they understand so much, you can see it in their eyes. James and I were just talking yesterday about how Joshua tests us, when we tell him not to do something he tries it again, and we again tell him no, so then he does it really slowly to see what we will do then. It is crazy how srong headed they can be. Anyhow, good luck, and I will let you know if I find the secret to redirecting these strong willed children we have.
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